Benjamin is almost seven months old and I can't believe all that has happened and just how fortunate and blessed we have been since he's come into our lives. Many people have inquired about his health and so many have offered support. We are just so grateful to everyone for all that you have done for us. It's hard to express it in words. We have been humbled by this experience and what everyone has been willing to do for us.
Since most people who read this are family and friends you probably already know most of Benjamin's story. I want to remember all the details (well most of them) about everything that has happened so that when Ben grows up I can tell him all about the crazy journey he's been on and how far he has come. I feel like this will be a good place for us to journal and then continue to give updates on Ben, especially so we can have something to look back on. And now that I feel like we are really in a good place, I am finally feeling comfortable enough rehashing and talking about what we went through and how life is with Benjamin. It's great by the way. :)
So with that I'll start with his birth story.
Benjamin Glenn Bogna was born December 28, 2013 at 7:24 AM. Here is a picture of him just after he was born and before he was hooked up to everything.
The 36 hours before that happened so quickly. Unfortunately I truly can't remember every little detail that happened but here's my best shot at a recap!
We checked in to the hospital on December 26th at about 7:45 pm. I was a week past my due date and scheduled to be induced. We were put into a temporary room until a private room was available. I was hooked up to a couple belts to monitor baby's heart rate and contractions. Shortly after, a doctor came in to discuss how we would proceed with the induction. We had the option of a couple different medications that would help to get me dilated and the labor started. We decided what medication to start with and the doctor left to go get the order in.
About ten minutes later I felt a contraction (similar to ones I had been having in previous days at home, not painful) and about 4 nurses and a doctor came rushing into the room. First they had me try to lie on either side and nothing changed so they told me to get on all fours and put an oxygen mask on me. It was chaos with a lot of people talking at once and then they gave me a shot of terbutaline in my arm. Apparently I had a long contraction and the baby's heart rate had dropped. This changed the course we were going for labor. I was given a stress test to see how well the baby would tolerate contractions and he did well so we moved forward with cervadil to get my labor started. We slept that night and I was woken up again in the morning with a similar situation as the night before. The cervadil was pulled out and we repeated the same process that happened but made it with no shot in the arm this time.
It was a scary experience thus far. A doctor came in to talk to us and told us that if at any time we wanted to move forward with a c section we could. I really didn't know what to do. I just wanted to follow the advice of our doctors so with that we moved forward with the foley balloon. This would help to get me further dilated. The balloon was in for about 4 hours before it fell out. During that time my contractions had gotten stronger but then backed off again. I was told to wait for the epideral as long as I could, especially since I wasn't dilating very well on my own. When the foley balloon fell out I was still only at a 3-4 cm dilated.
At this point it was late Friday afternoon and I was told just to wait for a couple hours to see if I would dilate on my own anymore before we would proceed to break my water and start pitocin. Fast forward a few hours, doctor broke my water and we waited some more to see if contractions would start. I was having contractions but still not dilating further. They started me on a small amount of pitocin and OWW contractions hurt! I tried to wait as long as I could for the epideral and ended up getting it in the middle of the night Friday (around 1AM). It helped me sleep and then at 7am more nurses and doctors rushed in. I knew the drill at this point but this time even with the shot apparently baby's heart rate was still down. They rushed me into the OR and prepared for an emergency c section. During this time the baby's heart rate had come back up but they still felt it important to move forward considering all that had happened so far. A doctor finally filled Timmy in on what was happening and he scrubbed up and came into the room. I was so scared and shaking uncontrollably. For those of you who have had the tubertuline shot you know what it does to your body as you are coming off of it. I'm so grateful for my husband who held my hand and told me everything was going to be okay. I was so scared for my baby who had already been through these contractions that brought down his heart rate. I wanted him out but I wanted him safe.
At this point it was late Friday afternoon and I was told just to wait for a couple hours to see if I would dilate on my own anymore before we would proceed to break my water and start pitocin. Fast forward a few hours, doctor broke my water and we waited some more to see if contractions would start. I was having contractions but still not dilating further. They started me on a small amount of pitocin and OWW contractions hurt! I tried to wait as long as I could for the epideral and ended up getting it in the middle of the night Friday (around 1AM). It helped me sleep and then at 7am more nurses and doctors rushed in. I knew the drill at this point but this time even with the shot apparently baby's heart rate was still down. They rushed me into the OR and prepared for an emergency c section. During this time the baby's heart rate had come back up but they still felt it important to move forward considering all that had happened so far. A doctor finally filled Timmy in on what was happening and he scrubbed up and came into the room. I was so scared and shaking uncontrollably. For those of you who have had the tubertuline shot you know what it does to your body as you are coming off of it. I'm so grateful for my husband who held my hand and told me everything was going to be okay. I was so scared for my baby who had already been through these contractions that brought down his heart rate. I wanted him out but I wanted him safe.
As they worked on my pain medication (a spinal block) the doctors talked me through what was happening and what I would feel. Then as they moved forward with everything I was literally holding my breath just waiting to hear my sweet baby. As they were going to pull him out they asked Tim if he wanted to take a look. Tim watched as Benjamin Glenn Bogna made his entrance into the world at 7:24 am. I continued to hold my breath until I heard him cry. That sweet cry was music to my ears, at that moment I was so happy. I could finally breathe and I cried like a baby. I felt reassured that the baby was here and he was fine, he cried.
As they were sewing me back up Tim was with Benjamin while the NICU doctors came in and checked him out. They congratulated Tim on a healthy baby boy and left. Our nurse, Grace, continued to do a couple tests on Ben and noticed his coloring was off. She called the doctors to come back in and check him one more time. When they came back in this time they agreed with her that something wasn't right. They cleaned Benjamin off, wrapped him up and brought him over to me for literally 5 seconds. I kissed his sweet squishy face as much as I could. Then they took him for tests. I had no clue what was happening. For those of you that have had a C-section you know you're pretty out of it... well that combined with the shot of tubertuline that had been given to me just moments before the C-section made me an anxious wreck. I was wheeled to the recovery room while Tim went with Ben.
I remember laying in the recovery room feeling happy but confused. I was still very shaky. And then it hit me - it had been over an hour - where was my baby and husband?!
It was as if they had heard me and Tim came in accompanied with a doctor... and no baby. I felt my heart sink. What was wrong with my baby? My heart was racing.
The doctor explained to me that Benjamin was born with a heart defect: transposition of the great arteries. You can find all the medical jargon and explanation here but essentially Benjamin's two main arteries going out of his heart were switched which is a problem because too little oxygen is in the blood that is being pumped from the heart to the rest of the body. If he didn't have open heart surgery he would die. My world was crumbling. I don't think I could comprehend what was happening as the doctor was talking to me. I didn't know what any of this meant.
When she left Tim and I sat together and cried. Was our baby going to be okay? He showed me pictures and videos he took of Benjamin as they were checking him out and setting him up in the NICU. He was beautiful. I was heartbroken and scared that my baby was in pain. Little did I know that this was just the beginning of what would be a very long journey for our little family.
Tim and I had been told that nothing can really prepare you for parenthood, and all those people were right... nothing could have prepared us for this. And even if we had known about the heart condition before Ben was born I really don't think anything could have adequately prepared us for the NICU and what we went through. But I can tell you this, we are stronger than ever because of it.
When she left Tim and I sat together and cried. Was our baby going to be okay? He showed me pictures and videos he took of Benjamin as they were checking him out and setting him up in the NICU. He was beautiful. I was heartbroken and scared that my baby was in pain. Little did I know that this was just the beginning of what would be a very long journey for our little family.
Tim and I had been told that nothing can really prepare you for parenthood, and all those people were right... nothing could have prepared us for this. And even if we had known about the heart condition before Ben was born I really don't think anything could have adequately prepared us for the NICU and what we went through. But I can tell you this, we are stronger than ever because of it.
Thank you for sharing your birth story. ((hugs)) I cannot imagine what you guys all went through. Benjamin is such a strong little guy.
ReplyDeleteThanks Amy! He is doing so well now. We are so happy. :) XO
Delete